Vulnerability

So many of us grew up with imprints that hinder us from sharing and expressing our feelings in front of our children, allowing them to fully express their feelings, taking responsibility when we are wrong and/or apologizing to our children. As a result, doing any of this creates feelings of fear and a belief that if we do or allow this we will fail our children.

In truth, home is the learning foundation for all of our future relationships.

  1. If I allow myself to express my feelings in front of my child, I teach them how to express their feelings. This can seem like a scary idea if you have experienced your parents feelings as shaming, blaming or toxically inappropriate. This is about modeling feelings in a healthy appropriate manner.
  2. If I support and create a safe place for my child to express their feelings they will learn they have a voice in the world. Allow your child the space to figure out how to express that feeling without judgment and fear. They need to have experiences of all manners so they can choose who they want to be.
  3. If I take responsibility when I am wrong my child will do the same. It is chronic issue within our culture that people blame everyone else for what has gone wrong or have learned to berate themselves and become small when they have made a mistake.
  4. To apologize and ask for forgiveness is scary. Can you ask for forgiveness and allow your child to say no? Or even give them permission to say no?  This will not only teach your child to apologize and ask for forgiveness, it will provide the experience to let go of grudges and be authentic with their feelings.

The truth: When I courageously allow myself to become vulnerable with my children, I am consciously giving my children permission to do the same.

 

 

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